3 is enough!

A couple of weeks ago I had the privilege of watching my friends adorable little 4 month old girl.  I got to bottle feed her, ugh, that made my heart ache.  I loved holding a small baby again, feeding her and having her look at me the whole time.  I loved having her lay on the blanket on the floor and squeal and baby talk.  I loved having her here, and then I realized just how much I don't want any more kids, haha.  I have always questioned if we were truly done having kids.  My heart aches as Hayley grows up and I know I wont have a little one in onsies who needs me to bottle feed her or carry her everywhere.  There is no way we can be done having babies!!  And then I added a fourth for the day and I know that I am indeed done!!!  She was blissful while we were home....and then we had to leave the house.  Cass had stuff at the school we needed to do so my first obstacle was getting 2 babies in the car.  Who do I take first?  Who gets to sit alone in the car while I go round up the others?  How am I going to drive?  I already had Hayley's seat in the middle part of our car so I had to put our little friend next to her.  Well, her seat sits backward and ti is a huge seat, so I had to slide my seat up.  I felt like a moron sitting so close to the steering wheel!!!  Then we actually got to the school and I strapped the smallest one to me in a snugli, followed by one in the stroller, followed by 2 kids holding the stroller while we walked up a steep hill.  I was sweaty and out of breath once we got to the top.  Yes, it may be because I am horridly out of shape but I also had a ton of kids!!!!  One of which was strapped to my chest and I forgot just how heavy a baby gets when strapped that way.  It was horrid people!!!!!  But, it made me put the nail in the baby makin' coffin for sure.  My uterus is ok with it now, it does ache when I see a small baby and get to snuggle them, but then it remembers the craziness of going anywhere and realize, I like some sort of freedom.  Now, let me leave you with this sweet face I got to snuggle for a day!!

Yes, that is my chunky monkey on the left.  She was so excited to be around a baby!!!  She also seemed incredibly large to me when I sat them next to one another.  She is growing up!!!  Ugh, maybe I want another baby.....no, no uterus, calm down!!!